Mothers Day Quotes! Funny Quotes and Sayings from Erma Bombeck — totally giggle inspiring and worth retweeting, liking, and sharing with your friends and family for the holiday!
“Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart…” claimed funny mom Erma Bombeck. While the legendary pop culture writer and green celebrity passed away back in 1996, she remains one of the funniest mothers to have ever lived to this day.
When she was dying, Bombeck remembered the little things in life that made her days special — and things on her list of what mattered never seemed to be fame, money, or popularity. What mattered most to Erma Bombeck was being a parent as well as a wonderfully dysfunctional housekeeper and giggling role model writing about life as a 20th century modern woman. Here are just a few pearls of wisdom about parenting that are worth quoting — quotes by Erma Bombeck.
May she rest in peace and may all mothers out there know today and every day that life is short. Enjoy time with your kids every day, no matter what their ages, and treat yourself to a special holiday to play queen for the day on Mother’s Day — and for at least a few minutes every other day.
- Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter-productivity.
- I’m trying very hard to understand this generation. They have adjusted the timetable for childbearing so that menopause and teaching a sixteen-year-old how to drive a car will occur in the same week.
- My theory on housework is, if the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?
- Why would anyone steal a shopping cart? It’s like stealing a two-year-old.
- No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there is wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick.
- One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child’s name and how old he or she is.
- Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.
- My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first one being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
- When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.
- In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn’t danced on television.
Be sweet — please retweet!
SOURCE: http://www.law-of-attraction-parenting.com/funny-parenting-tips.html